Sooo, I received a call at work from my future ex…He wanted to know when I was coming home. Usually, this means “something”…Apparently, he was on his way to Home Depot (uh-oh), to get something to fix the outdoor faucet (leaking when turned on), and wanted to let me know he had shut off the water in the whole house. O boy…
Now, H is not what you call “handy”. No, I don’t expect him to know how to repair anything just because he’s a man. As a matter of fact, I wish nothing more than for him to stop trying to fix/install things. Seriously. You think I’m joking? Here’s a tiny list of SOME of the various tasks he’s accomplished:
-glued back together a cookie jar using packing tape (bonus points for using clear tape).
-installed window AC not by centering it, but by placing the unit almost all the way to the left, so the flexible panel on the right side had to be super stretched and nailed down to the side of the window frame to compensate.
-worked on our cars using electric and duck tape in places you would normally not find either item; did find a few large bolts near my cup holder once, but according to H, il mechanico, they were not needed; managed to get a rag stuck in the timing belt, but I can’t remember what he was trying to do then.
-invited one of his friends who is a non-certified electrician/plumber/clown (I don’t think he was ever trained in anything) to check our heat radiators and repair one of them. Between the two, I found black handprints all over the guest bedroom wall (it now needs to be repainted), the door frame, and I’m sure in other places (I had to leave the bedroom due to impending nervous breakdown). O yes, I can now safely say we need a new radiator plus parts.
Which brings me to the present…the leaky outdoor faucet. You would think, being as cheap as he is, that he would put a bucket underneath it, to collect the water. Instead, he let it flow down the driveway…He took the faucet apart, tried to fix it with various plumbing tools (water bottle caps, pieces of plastic off of a shopping bag, you know, the usual), and voilá! No more leaking! Also no longer working.
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