And Here Come the Water Works…

I have no idea why I’m leaking water all the time. I don’t even know how it happened, but I was talking to K at work, and all of a sudden, I was re-living my life when I was sent away to Portugal.

I can’t believe how much it still hurts me, how I felt so guilty for hurting G, how I felt rejected and abandoned by my own father…He sent me away without giving me any details or money. Just thinking about how lucky I was I had saved some money and took it with me, because he never even thought of how I would go from the airport to any one of my relatives’ houses. Or where I would be staying.

He told me to pack my crap, and get ready to leave. No date, no cat, nothing. I took a train, lugging big suitcases with all the belongings I could fit in them. I had never felt so lost. I wish I had left the bad memories behind, and only kept the good ones, but even these were hard to think about.