The Candle Guy

If I had sand on me, I would have thrown it at this guy's eyes.

Every now and then, we have vendors coming in with products to sell to the overly stressed workers (read: easy targets) of the companies that reside in our professional building. Yesterday, we had the "candle guy".

It all started innocently enough, and it then progressed to a close-encounter with my fist and his gut (in my imagination, of course) in less than 5 minutes.

I'm with my co-workers, just browsing the selection, and happen to casually mention "too bad I can't have candles" (but could totally have bought the strawberry daiquiri one because it looked so cute. Glad I didn't now. Sucka!) to one of the girls. "O that's right, because of the cats!" is my friend's reply.

Candle Guy interjects, wanting to know why, exactly, was it that I couldn't have candles if I had cats, with an attitude that could rival that of Naomi Campbell. Blink, blink, blink, pardonnez-moi? Instead of giving him a dirty look and walking away, my evil within (not gas this time), decides to see how far this idiocy can reach.

Apparently, very far.

We go back and forth with this stupid conversation, me mentioning that my cats are especially feisty (I wouldn't have it any other way), him saying that if I had trained my cats well...

Aiiiiiiiiiiiii, I don't think I have to go any further into it, but needless to say, I was so highly offended, that if anyone at that point, would have offered me a deliciously, hot cinnabon, I might have to ask them to just put it aside (for a second, I mean, who am I kidding here), while I catch my breath.


Ahh, Candle Guy...if the relaxation candles you are pushing were any good, I wouldn't have had the urge to scratch your face off.